I feel bad not having kept a journal for years. I used to be so vigilent at writing in a journal on a daily basis. Since my first marriage and since getting sort of "beat up" by life, I lost this innate gift and passion for writing. Keeping a blog—one for you, one for Amari, and our family blog, and a few personal journal entries here and there— is about the extent of my journal keeping. I think I have also let pictures do most of the memory recalling. A picture is worth a thousand words, and boy do I have thousands of memories of my children.
There is so much advice I wish I could pass on, from years back to the present—advice of things I have lived, seen, and known; things I don't necessarily wish you to believe because I know you must live out your own life and have your own experiences, but if any of this is a help to you—your future self—then this was worth taking a moment to write down.
(mind you these all might be random, but I shall write them as they are remembered in my heart and as they come into my mind).
I want you to LIVE life (when you are young, live it out of a suitcase). Adventure this world, live your dreams, live with passion, live with a conscious state of knowing that this is a moment to refine you, to one day define you, to add to a collection of memories you can take off your bookshelf and read during a moment of gloom, despair, or forgetfulness.
I want you to remember to live with no regrets. Always follow your heart. Do things with purpose.
Know that you can do anything you set your mind too. And that there is nothing too hard that you can't accomplish.
LAUGH! Humor is the most attractive quality you could posses; it can get you through almost anything.
Be sensitive to women and their needs.
Always work on being a better communicator (you don't know how far you can go in life, relationships in particular, when you are an effective communicator).
Take time to enjoy the beauties around you; meditate, contemplate, BE in nature
Remember to BREATHE
Remember that weaknesses are given to you so you can be humble. Put your faith in God, come to him in humility and your weaknesses will become strengths. Even if they don't become strengths in this life, learn to love them and accept them as you accept your strengths (Ether 12).
Along with that thought: 33 years of living and I just now came to this epiphany: it's easier to overcome ones faults or weaknesses if one first learns to accepts them.
Why is it so easy for us to love our good parts and not our bad? Are we afraid if we love and embrace ALL of who we are--yes even our seemingly "unattractive" self (whom we try to hide from the rest of the world)--we might run the risk of not being able to change? I think this is a majorly flawed way of living ones life.
It is much easier to accept the things you cannot change, and change the things you are learning to accept.
In my opinion, this is a far more beautiful, and honest way of living.
Utilize your priesthood always! Not just for administering blessings when others are sick, but for anything you or others need help with. You have been given Gods power, use it!
Be a leader. Be someone others look up to, especially your siblings.
Don't be afraid of showing your talents and using them. Try to foster every good gift the Lord has given you.
Know that your Father in Heaven is your PERFECT Father. Although they love you, your earthly parents will fail, they are not perfect, but there is one who is: turn to Him. Know that He loves you unconditionally
The scriptures hold many of life's answers; look to them when you need help.
Remember to be selfless but never lose yourself in the process (I am referring to a time when you become a daddy, or any other suitable time).
The only person you should CARE about impressing is your Father in Heaven. What other's think doesn't matter.
Don't be afraid to stand out, be who you are. When you are older you will realize trying to fit in or impress others was a waste of time.
Try to associate with people that believe in you, people that push you to be better, people who are a positive influence in your life. Life is way too short to be in the association of people who are constantly trying to bring you down in an effort to elevate themselves.
Live your life in your early 20's. Take the time to find yourself, to get an education, to go on a mission, to find the qualities and traits you desire in a woman BEFORE you settle down and get married and have children (you will be a much better spouse and daddy).
Take responsibility for your actions, don't pawn them off on someone else even if someone enacted something upon you that wasn't seemingly your fault.
FORGIVE. This is such a hard principle to live, but I promise you, through recent years of experience in holding onto a grudge, that the only person affected by lack of forgiveness is yourself. It is like a snake bite, the snake slithers away unharmed but you are left with the venom. It isn't worth your time or happiness to hold onto things.
Learn all that you can; even if you don't get a formal education (which I at least ADVISE you trying to do simply so you can learn life long skills such as discipline, the ability to study, retain information, obtain drive, etc.) seek to learn from good books, good mentors, and anything you can get your hands on. Furthermore, APPLY what you learn!
Try to read your scriptures, pray, and read something positive on a daily basis (your day will go so much better if you put these things first)
Remember your priorities, NOTHING comes before family
SERVE: it is the greatest anecdote to depression and self-pitty
Care for animals, recycle, take care of this planet (DO NOT LITER)
Exercise! Not only is it important in keeping your body healthy but it will help give you mental clarity, it will help you release stress, and overall it is the best medicine you can take for your body.
PLEASE, PLEASE, I BEG of you (from seeing the life-long damage it has done to your Dad, and my own siblings) don't experiment with drugs or alcohol. If you are struggling with something, TALK to someone, pick up a hobby . . . do anything but fall prey to drugs. They will take your freedom from you (present and future). They will make you so you are NOT in control and they will limit so many of your choices.
I am far from perfect; I will never claim to be perfect. I struggle just like you; I have so many faults and weaknesses. Every night I pray with you and ask Heavenly Father to forgive me of my weaknesses and for you to see past them. I want you to know this because I don't want you growing up with a false perception of me—seeing me as unrelatable or untouchable. Yes, I am your mother, and with that calling comes the responsibility to give you structure and guidelines and try to help you find your way in this life, but I will NEVER presume to be better than you. You are just as much my teacher; we are learning and growing in this life together. I love you, and more than anything I want you to feel comfortable coming to me, knowing I won't judge you or belittle you. I have made so many poor choices and mistakes in my life, I have all the room in the world to LOVE you through yours.
0 comments:
Post a Comment